Unsolicited Advice on Asking Good Questions (Plus a Real Life Example from a Rare Official Meeting in 2003 with then-Malaysian Prime Minister Mahathir Mahamad)
I did have a question. In the third paragraph, you talk about the importance of sometimes playing dumb "I don't recognize that acronym," for example. Then in the second paragraph of "The frontier between Knowing and Not Knowing," you suggest that the kind of questions whose answer they might easily find on their own is better left unasked. I'm having a hard time reconciling these two. Or is that where the art lies?
Thanks for the close reading, Mary. I think that’s exactly right. It will be a judgement call, and depend on the person with whom you’re speaking, more art than science in the end. In the “effective communication” segment of the core diplomatic skills course I helped launch during my final year as a Foreign Service Officer, we addressed that very question. There will be times when you will want to spell out the acronym to make sure you’re understood (or to ask for it to be spelled out to make sure you understand). At other times, use the acronym to make sure you’re not telling someone what they already know (and don’t expect to have it spelled out if it’s assumed you should know). I imagine a similar situation holds in medicine.
Yes, a similar thing does hold in medicine. If one's job is to communicate on a personal, synchronous level (as opposed to a mass, asynchronous level), one needs some skill at these things, regardless of what the subject matter is.
I suppose primary care is not that different from diplomacy where I'm trying to figure out what the person I'm talking w plans to do, what do they *really* mean by telling me their knee hurts, etc. and to negotiate my way to a solution we are both happy with.
Interesting article. Thank you.
I did have a question. In the third paragraph, you talk about the importance of sometimes playing dumb "I don't recognize that acronym," for example. Then in the second paragraph of "The frontier between Knowing and Not Knowing," you suggest that the kind of questions whose answer they might easily find on their own is better left unasked. I'm having a hard time reconciling these two. Or is that where the art lies?
Frankly it’s also a matter of not asking someone else to do your homework.
Thanks for the close reading, Mary. I think that’s exactly right. It will be a judgement call, and depend on the person with whom you’re speaking, more art than science in the end. In the “effective communication” segment of the core diplomatic skills course I helped launch during my final year as a Foreign Service Officer, we addressed that very question. There will be times when you will want to spell out the acronym to make sure you’re understood (or to ask for it to be spelled out to make sure you understand). At other times, use the acronym to make sure you’re not telling someone what they already know (and don’t expect to have it spelled out if it’s assumed you should know). I imagine a similar situation holds in medicine.
Yes, a similar thing does hold in medicine. If one's job is to communicate on a personal, synchronous level (as opposed to a mass, asynchronous level), one needs some skill at these things, regardless of what the subject matter is.
I suppose primary care is not that different from diplomacy where I'm trying to figure out what the person I'm talking w plans to do, what do they *really* mean by telling me their knee hurts, etc. and to negotiate my way to a solution we are both happy with.
I came here expecting titillating erotica. What the HECK? 🤔
Good reminder to all in every field, Alex. Many thanks.
Thanks Cynthia. Yes, indeed. And anyone can do it!